And today I am 23. One more year, one year passing and a career that is growing. I begin to feel the time passing on my skin, I begin to feel they are no longer a child. For years now I can not remember a happy birthday, the kind where you're happy and carefree aspects that date because everyone will do their best wishes. My birthdays only bring sadness.
My memory goes to some pictures I have here now in my hands ... I see a happy child, smiling, carefree, that little girl that I ceased to be a lot. The house parties, surprises, someone who was preparing a cake, the smiles of friends around me. I stopped celebrating my birthday with friends when I realized that they were happy to celebrate with me there were not any more, because when you grow up you realize the wickedness of people, they do not understand or better yet their indifference. Of course if you looked at my real profile on Facebook and read it on my wall you would find many of those "Wishes" and "Happy Birthday" to think that now is just ranting ... there was one of those friends who occasionally deigns to write a simple "Hello, how are you?" or better yet give me a call!
are no longer a child now, I stopped believing in many things, true friends can be counted on the fingers of one hand and many, many people over the years I have only disappointed. It 's so slowly that I have "cooled" and my life, my feelings, my joys and my tears have become my one and only! I learned to be selfish, to think about what I wanted and I wanted to date and I got to do because every time my goal. I can not do something for others. The few people I trust that by now I have been aware of the good that reserve for them and know what it costs to dedicate a part of my heart. It is from these people that I would never be disappointed. Each giorno subisco qualcosa di duro sulla mia pelle e che sia uno sguardo o una parola cattiva detta da una madre, sto imparando a farmi forza da sola. Sto imparando a fregarmene,a mandare al diavolo tutti e fare sempre di testa mia,che se sto sbagliando sono libera di farlo e cosciente di volerlo fare. Metto uno scudo tra me e gli altri, della mura di cinta che possano proteggermi abbastanza e vorrei che questo bastasse, vorrei non dovermi mostrare fragile agli occhi degli altri quando tutto va storto,vorrei non tornare ad essere una bambina. Certo quella bambina delle foto un po’ la rimpiango,nei suoi occhi c’era quell’allegria che adesso a stento riesce a venire fuori, a momenti.
Crescere,andare avanti credendo nei my dreams, to reach this degree that I'm sweating so much and be loved, wanted and desired good for what they are, with all my faults and helping to open our hearts ... this is the hope that I do on the day of my birthday!
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